Simon White and friend and neighbour Shirley Boyle are first to host, in the picturesque village of Madeley, in Cheshire.
On arrival, most of the guests are awed by the historical 16th century B&B. In the afternoon, Simon and Shirley take their guests tap dancing and, in keeping with the five-star luxury, to a private fine-dining restaurant for dinner.
Next morning, however, one of the guests reports her dissatisfaction with the layout of her bedroom... and the garnish on her breakfast eggs.